Things that suck from the internet.

  I recently disabled my facebook account without telling everybody. Nobody has noticed yet. That sucks. While I accept that it is a useful and enjoyable way to keep up with friends (assuming you have any), the team at CRACKED.com have produced this very accurate depiction of ghosts from the past haunting your present through the wonder of fiber optics. In '10 People From Your Past Who Will Haunt You on Facebook'.

The Traveller

What They'll Say:
Hi there! Long time no see! Just over here in Liverpool and killing time before the Premier League match - downing a few pints, you know? - and spotted you on the internet. I might have found you earlier, but there's no internet in South America (at least, not worth using ;) and the net cafes were too expensive in Japan.
I'm moving around a fair bit at the moment, so here's a link to my travel blog so you can keep track of where I am. Be sure to take a look at the pics I took while trekking in Nepal. It's an amazing place. Have you been? How's it going? Drop us a line.

What They'll Really Mean:

Look at how many countries I've been to. I'm better than you.

Thinks They Moved on from High School

What They'll Say:
Is this who I think it is? I hope so or I might look a bit crazy. I can assure you I'm not though. You might remember me. I wasn't really 'known' at high school. I kept to myself. Surely you remember when I played − or tried to play − the Guns N Roses medley on the piano for the talent quest? Yeah that was me.
I didn't miss that place when I went to college. Met a nice girl really quickly and I'm still with her. These days I'm managing a small but loyal team for a software company. I'm not bitter about high school though. Some good memories. How are you anyway?

What They'll Really Mean:

I was rejected at high school but I've found a place where I'm accepted. I'm better than you.

Read more: 10 People From Your Past Who Will Haunt You On Facebook | Cracked.com http://www.cracked.com/article_16670_10-people-from-your-past-who-will-haunt-you-facebook.html#ixzz1Y3q6C4GU

Facebook sucks. So does the past. And people. Especially me.

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Crazy people don't suck. They can't help it. Their public access TV shows, however, do suck. If you haven't already heard of David Liebe Hart, then... um... you suck.

 

Actually, I take it back. That's amazing. But amazing things suck.

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Bill O'Reilly Sucks (and blows, and huffs, and blusters. And he lives off a diet of children's tears and toenails, alledgedly) 

 

Disclaimer: allegations regarding Mr. O'Reilly's diet are unsubstantiated, as are the allegations concerning Dingos eating children, the Pied Piper stealing children, or God ordering the deaths of all the first-born children in Egypt. 

Disclaimers suck.